Green is for Go...

It's amazing how just pulling on my favorite pair of running shorts is somehow motivating. They are a two tone green pair of Nike shorts, made out of some sort of magic parachute material that sends me skydiving into a day full of tasks...ok, I think they're really some synthetic material but that makes them no less magical. I jump out of the shower and pull on my magic pants and get my day started. No need to know that this is all happening around 10:30am...no judging. Was your kid up for an hour at 3 am? I think not.

Speaking of kids, Newell is now actively mobile. He's not walking yet but cruising (this is apparently the made up mom word for pulling up on furniture, walls, or anything else within reach and walking alongside said object) This mobile thing is a dangerous cat. You see, while part of me now thinks he must be at least 5 years old and ready for kindergarten, the other part things that I must hover non-stop to keep him from killing himself. He's a daredevil. He climbs things and then summersaults off them. And he eats things. Which kept me on poison control watch last week. Awesome. On a related note, if any parents out there would like a poison control magnet or sticker, they sent me a good dozen of each. Apparently I worried them enough that they're hoping I tatoo the number on my arm...perhaps I should.

Ok, sorry, this is Monday and I'm polishing off my first cup of coffee so this is quite scattered. As for jewelry, here's where I'm at...I'm looking for models who want to wear stuff for my new website--anyone?! I'm working to keep this blog things rolling a little better, finishing organizing the craft room (this is really an ongoing and never ending task), finalizing some great custom works, (I'll post pics soon!) and waiting patiently for some new materials that are going to open up a whole new line of Sandcastle. Stay tuned, lots of new stuff ahead, and hopefully a few less scattered, less boring blogs!

So here I am, Monday morning trying to get all my ducks in a row. This week is already so full but I'm looking forward to all of it.

A Strange Journey

I'm writing this blog as a fill-in/catch up/rejoicing that God has done some incredible things in the life of our family over the past year and half or so. So, in order for any of this to make sense let's buzz back to Spring 2009. Caleb and I , trying to decide what direction God may be calling us, began to research life as mission pilots. Or rather, a mission pilot and spouse seeing that I don't fly. We talked to several organizations, even met with a recruiter until May 5th, 2009. Happy Cinco De Mayo, Jill finds out she's pregnant. This exciting and terrifying news sent us on a whirl wind of questions and quests, as we were hoping that when we started a family I would be able to stay at home with our kids. And on Cinco De Mayo, 2009--that looked unlikely. Needless to say, a baby closed the mission pilot doors for the time being. I wasn't really ready to do my first baby experience in a 3rd world country. Sure, I'm a chicken. :)

Anyhow, with our news and our questions, we began seeking and praying that God would open a door for me to be a stay at home mom with our baby. Meanwhile, our due date drew closer and we were still doctoring 2 hours away from our current home. With no new job outlooks on the horizon for Caleb, we decided to move to Hillsboro. My job was a huge blessing because I was able to stay home to work often and it provided health insurance. We were also blessed that Caleb's self-employment as a flight instructor and painter allowed for us to move in between Emporia and Salina to be closer to our Dr and split the commute for both of us. How blessed I am to have a husband who put in some awfully long days there in Hillsboro. We rented a darling little house that the land-lords were willing to do on a month-to-month basis and about 5 weeks later, we brought our little boy home to it.

And that was when things got tough for me. Newell was born on the 5th of January and I knew my maternity leave was up the end of February. Granted some of this was probably complicated by postpartum, but I seriously couldn't even look at Valentine's displays in stores because I knew that was very close to when I would have to begin work. Caleb and I had decided that if I wasn't going to be able to be home all the time, we would alternate so that when I did have to make trips for work Caleb would stay with Newell. During those trips I would beg and plead with God to change something so that I didn't have to leave my sweet little boy. It absolutely tore me up. The days working at home weren't bad because he was with me, but being away from him was terrible. But rather than trusting God and His plan I badgered Him. I'd get angry. I'd cry. I felt very alone and childish and self centered. The only thing I could remember praying for consistently was a way to stay home with Newell. God opened my eyes to my selfishness but my heart was becoming hardened as I waited. Impatiently. In my head God was going to give me a way out before Newell was born. But then he was born and I was still working. Then I thought, surely by the time my maternity leave is over. And nothing... Then I thought, by the end of my contract, God will have something in store...but I watched that date slide near and I wasn't sure how I was going to handle it. But, I was feeling better about things. Newell was getting older and his time with his Dad was really good. I was working from home about 80% of the time and had quite a few vacation days on the horizon which would be good too. And honestly, I really liked my job. I worked with great people and enjoyed what I did. I just really missed my baby. And when I saw days on the calendar filling up with several days in a row that I was going to have to be away, it was painful.

But, 2 Timothy 2:13 says, "If we are faithless, he remains faithful--for he cannot deny himself." Little did I know that God was getting ready to show me this in a way I couldn't imagine...

Sometime that spring Caleb got a call from (hang in here now) his dad, who talked to a friend, who talked to a guy named Dick, who heard through the grapevine (yes as if this isn't grapevine enough!) that there was an opening for the manager at the El Dorado Airport and that Caleb might be interested. Caleb quickly called and checked into it, but the guy in charge said that they were almost done with the hiring process. They said he could turn in his resume, but they'd basically already hired their guy. Because at this point we're really good at jumping through hoops, we jumped and sent the resume anyway. They hired the other guy.

But then, several weeks later Caleb got a call from his Dad's friend who talked again to Dick who'd talked to someone who said the position was open and they were interested in Caleb but didn't know how to reach him. Thinking this whole thing was really weird but once again knowing we'd jumped through stranger hoops, Caleb sent out some feelers. Come to find out, the guy they had hired walked away for a better job 2 days into the Airport Manager position. Caleb was being looked at again. They called him for an interview and we tried not to hold our breath. Guessing what God's doing is never a game you're going to win. That much we'd learned. But, I had vacation to spare so Newell and I drove around a bit and looked at the town and did some shopping. Caleb got a second interview...

The next week, his job offer came in. As only God could arrange, he was taking a job that was going to let me stay home. We house shopped, packed up, bought a home, moved in, and are settling nicely. Newell started crawling the week we moved in mid-July and in the last 2 weeks has started pulling up to walking around--I can't imagine trying to get real work done with him motoring around the house, starting all sorts of mischief! But I don't have to because God was faithful. In blessing us in ways we do not deserve. Despite our questions, despite our doubts. His plan is greater than we can see in our tiny box. For those of you still with me reading, thank you. Thank you for your prayers, your love, your support during the challenging year or so of our life. We have learned so much but above all we have learned to be truly dependent on him. For He never fails us. And even when we feel alone, He is there.

Jilli

Dear Ethel

A few weeks ago I went to my cousin's dance recital in Minneapolis. She was the best of course and we went out to have a Coke and celebrate and that was when I encountered Ethel. Sitting on a table at the gas station was her auction bill with a date for this past Saturday. As I read over the listing I couldn't help but feel like I would really like Ethel. I decided that I was going to that auction. Several hours, a sunburn and a nice drive later I returned home with several purchases of inspiration for new jewelry. If I was writing Ethel, this is what I would say...

Dear Ethel,
One glance at your auction bill could tell anyone you were a lady of many loves. The trailers of doilies, china dolls, paintings, music, glass and linens attest to this on a hot Saturday in May. And while your things tell many stories of your life, the people gathered around have told me even more.
As I delicately sorted through your fine rhinestone pins and pierced earrings a friend of yours explained your love for jewelry. "Ethel always wore it," she said smiling, "even when she didn't feel well, you could always count on Ethel wearing her jewelry." Many spoke of your incredible kindness and love for Christ. And as I directly and indirectly picked up information about you I thought, this woman has lived life well. Touching as many others in the process as possible. Did you know you have stories from teaching that are still being told? Did you know you are "the favorite aunt"? I spent some of the time at your auction wondering what of these things were your favorites. I wondered if this was my auction if I would want to know what happened to some of my things. I wondered if you wanted to know what I was going to do with the things I purchased. As I went through the treasures I found I thought of all the loving care with which you had removed every button collected, un-stitched every zipper saved and I want you to know that I will love these things as much as you did. I will never again search for a button or the perfect zipper because i have a lifetime supply. I sorted each zipper into a little basket in my studio falling in love with a few favorites. I spent time taking each button and sorting them by color and material. The buttons you saved are simply un-matched by any I've ever seen before and I can not thank you enough for saving them. I am so grateful for your collection that you shared with me and I am anxious to turn some of them into beautiful jewelry that I too wear everyday. And somehow, though it makes me sad for you to think of all the things sold at that auction, I feel as though I met you a little bit that day and I feel as though we are friends. I promise you my dear friend Ethel, I will be a safe home for your years of collecting. It will not be in vain.

With a thankful heart for yours,
Jillian

By the numbers...

In honor of my brother Nick graduating Sunday with his degree in Mathematics and Secondary Education, today's blog will be by the numbers in reference to my 1st run with my jogging stroller yesterday.

1 is the number of times I've been out with the jogging sroller, the number of tires needing replaced and the number of half marathons I've ran.

2 is the number of years since that run, close to the number of miles I actually ran yesterday and the number of stable tires on my jogging stroller.

3 miles was the goal to run, the number of tires that needed air during the run and the number of blocks I walked during this endeavor.

4 (and a half) months is the age of my running buddy, the number of times I SHOULD be running a week and the number of times I thought about stopping for a Snickers and Pepsi.

5 the number of pounds left to get to pre-baby weight, the size of jeans I can squeeze into on a good day, the number of months that have seemed to fly by this year, the number of necklaces I have to make today and the final number of this short numerically organized blog!

Jilli

Patchwork

If you know me at all then you know my driving desire for a good deal. My husband Caleb said of me a couple weeks ago, “It’s really probably a good thing we don’t have a lot of money because if we did, I don’t think shopping would be nearly as fun for you!” I think he’s probably quite right. I love the thrill of a good bargain. The moment when the racks part at the Goodwill and “ahhhh!!!” (that’s heavenly choruses) the perfect pair of Gap khakis in your exact fit appears, on 99 cent day none the less…
However, despite my oversized zeal for a deal, there was one time I broke down for the perfect pair of jeans. You laugh, but I have seriously never NEVER dropped more than a $20 for a pair of jeans, until I found these…

It happened my Junior year of college and we have been best buds for going on 5 years this fall. Yes, I know but these are just that grand. Let me explain…my junior year the jeans that were “in” were the stretch fit. And by stretch fit I mean, painted to your thighs look. My thighs do not look good painted. Furthermore, I was starting a job with the football team and really didn’t want to stand out any more on the sidelines than my then 2 foot ponytail would already ensure. So my friend Donya and I spent a day at the mall searching out the perfect jeans. And I found them at AE. And I for the first time in my life dropped more than a 20 on them--$50 dollars (which was probably at LEAST half of my checkbook balance and probably the cause of the trip home for gas that didn’t quite work out…I got so close though!). So yes, I once spent $50 on jeans. 5 years ago. Let me tell you where all those friends have been…
First, they served their original purpose as my uniform for EVERY football game (including the 2 national playoff games!) that year. But during those weeks I fell in love with these jeans and generally have worn them 2-3 times a week during the fall and winter. I was wearing these jeans when I went on the mission trip that I met my husband on, I wore them even after I dropped a lot of weight playing soccer my senior year, I wore them when I moved into my very first own place outside of college, they made an appearance on normal days and abnormal days and made gloomy days feel better. This past year I was actually able to wear them until around my 7th month of pregnancy with Newell but alas all this wearing was well…wearing. But frugality in my life once again overcame common sense and rather than retiring these dear old friends, a few Saturdays ago I broke down and busted out my random fabric scraps to patch my old pals. It was while I patched these jeans that I started seeing the beauty in all the colors of scraps that I’ve collected (yes, in addition to being unbelievably tight I also have a difficulty parting with things that I have forked over even a quarter for, especially in the name of creativity). It was during this revelation that I decided to put together a few jewelry pieces with found scraps of fabric. With that, I unveil the Spring 2010 Fabric Sandcastle Collection, although a name for these pieces is still in the works, I thought I’d give you a sneak peek!

Garnet in the Rough

Shortly before I got married, a dear friend told me that being married was like constantly looking at yourself in the mirror—you quickly become aware of all your imperfections as you constantly have someone else to live life with. If that statement was true, having a baby is like having that mirror and a parrot. A really smart parrot that does all that good mimicking stuff.

And at some point in time during my pregnancy with Newell, it occurred to me that I was going to have a parrot. After all, aren’t we all parrots for a while? Think about this--at the beginning of your life, everything you have ever known or learned you’ve learned from someone else. You learn to copy, mimic and mock the sounds and actions of those around you. And as I thought about this little baby-to-be I realized that I wasn’t sure I was ready for a parrot…

When you think about having a little someone with you almost 24-7 watching everything you do and say knowing that these are the things they will someday do and say, you suddenly remember all the flaws in that mirror! As I thought on these things the old “diamond in the rough” expression came to mind. And as I became growingly aware of my own flaws and this perfect little moldable child Caleb and I were bringing into the world, no expression seemed more appropriate. Here I was, flawed and imperfect, yet, getting ready to be given one of the greatest gifts possible, pure and perfect (or stinking close to it :) ).

It was somewhere in the midst of all these random thoughts of motherhood that made me create the piece “A Garnet in the Rough.” The low grade turquoise disc holds a 5mm cut and polished Garnet (Newell’s birth stone) while his name “Newell Simeon Marsh” is hand hammered into the silver bezel holding everything together. In short, it symbolizes my time preparing for the unknown blessing and the impact he’s had on my life thus far. And perhaps the most promising hope I found in my thoughts and ramblings was Proverbs 22:6 says, “Train a child in the way he should go and he will not turn from it.”

The Fashion of Mommyhood

The first thing any parent will tell you when you find out your expecting is "your life will never be the same." While I can say I believed this overused statement (why else would people be so quick to use it if it weren't true?!) I can say there is one extent of the statement I never anticipated. It is not the late nights/early mornings, the inability to get out of the house on time for anything, or the incredible amount of laundry one tiny little soul can create. It is my personal style. Never did it cross my mind that a little baby would have any effect on my personal fashion choices. Never have I been so wrong.

During my 9th month of pregnancy, while weighing more than I ever thought my 5'3'' frame could handle (I might have just given myself an inch actually) I went shopping with my mother. Now, those of you who have been pregnant are scolding me from your screen as we speak (or sort-of speak). Truth be told, i wasn't looking for any new additions to my closet, I was trying to up the contractions I'd been having and move Newell's arrival along. Instead, I had a charming conversation with a 6 year old ("I noticed you're having a baby," she said. "I am," I replied. "You have a really large belly," she noted aloud. Fantastic.)

Anyhow, while 'shopping' Mom pulled out a shirt she thought would be cute for me. I distinctively remember telling her that once I wasn't pregnant, I probably wouldn't wear big fluffy shirts that I could have worn while I was. After all, I hadn't been in normal clothing for the better part of a year during which time my selection had become a little more picky.

Then Newell arrived! While I did anticipate the whole still being bigger than "normal" and had even purchased some additional sizes of pants, the real changes had only just begun...

First off, being a nursing mom leads to a fashion dilemma all of its own. After 24 years of working to keep particular things covered in the name of modesty-I now actually analyze how quickly and easily I can get certain things out. This particularly feels wrong when I'm getting ready for church.

After the potentially topless endeavor, I then became aware of my desire for a new hairstyle. Initially I thought growing my hair back out to its former length was a desirable style I wished to return to. After the one time I actually flat ironed it post birth resulted in not one, but two sticky spit-up jobs, I scheduled the chop. And Kelsy, you did fantastic! Less drying time, easy fix, and too short to spit-up in-that's pretty much my hairstyle qualifications these days! A great fix I've found for my super hectic days, I've become re-acquainted with the headband. Such a classic accessory I had no idea I had missed so much! Of course, I have made a few that while they do serve their original purpose, have a little more jazz than your average Dollar General half-circle.

Finally, and perhaps the most challenging for me was my style of jewelry. While I know kid proof will be just around the corner. My style of big chunky necklaces is being invaded by a little face that prefers similar positioning a great deal of the time. My latest piece is a compromise-made in part with satin cloth and metallic embroidery floss, Newell gets a soft head mat and I still get my classic statement jewelry piece (oh and it's large enough to be clasp-free, for easy nursing removal)
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My upcoming fashion change-large movable earrings. Once just a fun accessory for going out, these now serve as entertaining mobiles for my growing son. I suppose I should take advantage before he gets quicker at grabbing things...